I have put myself in a whirlwind. I'm tossed about by my emotions, determination and doubt. I don't know why I keep going, but I do. I just pray it's in God's Will that I continue to do what I am doing. A lot of people are living proof that being a good person, having a good heart, doing the "right" thing, etc., is not a guarantee that you are in God's Will. This is where learning and appreciating God's Grace comes in. Something that I forgot about while in the "church" I was in was God's Grace. We had certain goals to meet all the time and if we did not meet them, we'd be questioned. Like Leah, it was a long time before I could not feel bad about talking to someone about God/the church. For some reason I keep getting into direct sales and I still have issues with "reaching out" to people. I don't want to bother them, it may be illegal, etc. But, I keep having all these fears and excuses, so, I lean to the Internet. It's like a shield.
The more I've learned about boundaries and having them, the more I'm aware of them. I am still dealing with my anxiety and depression, so my fears are being refocused into moving forward in any way that seems easier than dealing with emotions. Right now things are justifiable, because I'm on a thin line. I have the emotional support of my mom, so that's good. I'm very grateful for her and I do what I do for her and me. I did have a class today, so I have a lot of new information to process and new connections to consider. I'm glad of the timing of the class. I'm hoping to implement and grow from what I've learned. This in itself seems in itself a great task, but I'm somehow wrapped up in trying to make something happen. I have this blog and the kscinderella.wordpress.com blog. I have the new store and website, GiftsWorthKeeping.storenvy.com. My physical store is already having to be moved because it's location is closing down. I just don't know what to do, so I pray and read and find good answers to some things, so I talk with God again. It's hard not knowing what's going to happen for real. Sometimes it seems like people think they "know" your life but they don't realize it's them they know. Their own lives, not yours. We are all connected and a lot of us are going through the same things. It's when I can not seem to gain control of everything in my life that I try to control and judge others. I'm open to correction in that area and tend to correct myself first even if it's just in my head.
So I just want to encourage everyone to look into your own world and find your peace. Don't let the devil get you distracted and wrapped up in the newest hot gossip. He likes to take your problems and mirror them in others lives so that you have something to talk about. God wants you to use those problems as healing for parts that are similar in your own life. Or, if you see what's happening, maybe you can bring encouragement and enlightenment to those going through the same thing.
I'm am not a licensed