I've already tried posting this once and have failed. I am so mad right now because of that. I am tired of the devil confusing things when I am seeking clarity. I don't know what I am supposed to do, because I'm already praying. People don't know what I am dealing with and I don't know what they are expecting from me. I don't want to assume things, I spent too much time doing that. I try to respect people, but when things start adding up that they really don't want to have to deal with me, then I have to let them go. I am tired of the devil trying to make me feel bad for being my kind of normal. To Hell with him and his minions. I will keep going forward, putting God at the front lines of my battle with him. I will not give up. You can not help how you react in triggering situations until you realize that you are in one. Then, once you start to deal with it and correct your thinking, or verify it, you realize that you are going through the healing process. Other people may not understand why you don't already know something. That's okay. Nobody has to do anything or tell anybody anything if they don't want to. Including you. It may or may not help the situation, that's where discernment comes in. I am learning to let people go after a shorter period of time. I don't just do it after one event, unless it's serious, which in itself is relative. You don't have to hold on to people who make it obvious that they don't want you around. Right now I am just confused. I don't know what people want. I try not to assume, not to befriend people right away. I try not to trust just anybody. I try not to overstep boundaries. The devil just keeps putting me in similar, triggering situations and now I get confused when I am dealing with some of them. Who do I go to for help, I try to go to those that actually know my situation, but I can't always do that. I am not good with interpersonal relationships, after dealing with that church & being so brainwashed I became a person who has to relate to everyone, Coming out thinking I knew it all, when what I did know was not based on good ways to learn anything. I don't know how to tell people I don't know. I don't know what you are doing or what you want from me. This is why I try to ask all the questions I can think of. I am tired of being on the defense with people I don't even know that well. The devil is at work & he wants to win, but he is a loser. No one is as much a loser as he is. He makes poor lost soles & other demons do his bidding. So, I will continue to pray & continue to fight with God's grace, mercy & help. I will not do this on my own, because I can not. I hope today finds you at peace and not having to deal with this mess all day. Love yourself, know your worth.
I'm am not a licensed